The metaphor of the adoption constellation
...Elsewhere (Grand, 2006), I have suggested that we need a systemic understanding that is broader in scope and more reflective of the changing shape of relationships in adoption. To assist in this task, I first proposed the concept of the adoption constellation in 1994. This metaphor not only allows for the consideration of adoptees, birth parents andadoptive parents, but also incorporates birth and adoptive families, service providers, teachers, physicians, the courts, social service workers, legislators and the clergy. In fact, anyone whose life is entwined with adoption is a member of the constellation.
The adoption constellation is seen as changing shape across development as different relationships assume heightened or reduced emotional valence. In the beginning of the adoption, birth parents, adoptive parents, the child and the facilitator play the most prominent roles. Whether the adoption is an open one or not will alter the shape of the constellation. Closed adoptions diminish the luminance of the birth mother. Open adoptions may give her pride of place (Sobol, Daly & Kelloway, 2000). Private adoptions move the facilitator tothe foreground (Daly & Sobol, 1994). During the early life of the adoption, extended family and friends play an important role in the constellation interms of welcoming the new member and conferring social credibility on the nuclear family (Kirk, 1964). As the child enters the school system, teachers join the constellation. One need only think about how they manage the notion of family inclusion to observe their direct effect upon adoptive parent-child relationships. Friends of the adoptee also become salient at this point in that they may challenge the legitimacy of the family’s definition. As the adoptee grows older, the peer group gains prominence, potentially pulling the adoptee in the direction of behaviors that willgenerate strong emotional responses on the part of the adoptive parents. Themes around risk taking, sexuality and fertility will have profound effects upon the shape of the adoptive family. If the adoptee or birth parent undertakes a search and if a reunion ensues, then elements of the constellation that have previously provided only background luminance, now become more salient. And if we leap ahead to the time when the adoptee becomes a parent, then this new addition will also help to form other emotional connections between members ofthe constellation.
Another advantage of using this systemic metaphor for adoptive relationships is that it allows for wider cultural forces such as societal attitudes and legislation to influence the shape of the constellation. In those jurisdictions where adoptions are traditionally closed and legislation limits the possibilities of birth family interacting with adoptive family, it would be expected that the distance between these two parts of the constellation would be great. However, this is not to say that the emotional gravitational pull between adoptee and birth family or adoptive parents and birth parents might not still be intense. In like manner, jurisdictions with open adoption legislation would be expected to have much less personal and emotional distance between constituent parties. Cultural attitudes about openness would have a parallel effect upon the placement of individuals in the constellation.
In summary, the metaphor of the adoption constellation allows for the changing shape and valence of relationships. It recognizes that with development, power relations take new forms. It encompasses the full range of individuals who have any connection to adoption. It might be pulled in the direction of the blackholes of silence, restricted communication and closed records. It is also able to incorporate the changing shape of adoptive relationships marked by open adoption, single parent adoption and same-sex couple adoption. This metaphor allows for the recognition that various elements in the constellation play differing roles over time. Finally, by utilizing this concept, we are able to take into consideration the dynamic interactive influences that occur between the various elements of the constellation, thus, yielding a more systemic view. As such, each element in the constellation, being either directly or indirectly inter-connected to other elements, has the potential to influence the full range of adoptive inter-relationships.
